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Godwin Samararatne
Living with Awareness

Retreat Talks in Fa Yim Kok, Lantau Island, Hong Kong

Day 4: 18th October 1998

4: Discussion on Meditation

Godwin: Does anyone have anything to share?

Retreatant: Very interestingly today I looked into who is the body. The body is just a feeling but my thought is this is my body. I was just thinking about the sutta where the Buddha said that everybody sees the body as a valuable thing, but the Buddha said the body in an arahant is just a burden. In a small part I had this feeling.

Godwin: That it is a burden?

Retreatant: Yes, because we are just these things, nothing there, nothing valuable; and yet we attach to it, it is a burden, lots of worries, some sort of suffering.

Godwin: I know of a text in which it says the body is a burden, feelings are a burden, what are called the five aggregates are burdens. Here the idea is they become a burden if we identify ourselves with them. A burden is something that we have to carry. So to put down the burden that we are carrying we have to learn not to identify with these five aggregates. Then they do not become a burden because, as you rightly said, in the case of an arahant, an enlightened person, this is how he or she sees the five aggregates. To put it in another way, these five aggregates when we are identifying ourselves with them, become a source of suffering, and if we can let go of identification with these five aggregates then the burden goes away and there is no suffering.

I would like to share what a meditator shared with me. She said that before she was having the meal, before she started to eat, she felt grateful. And when she felt grateful she had what is called sympathetic joy, the quality of Mudita. It touched me deeply how this small quality, this little quality of feeling grateful before eating a meal can generate the feeling of sympathetic joy.

Would anyone else like to share something?

Retreatant: This is another point connected with this feeling. While the feeling of the body and the ego becomes less and less yet I feel that there is still something there, sensations in the body, like stray cats or dogs that have come. They just come around so you have to take care of them even though you don't identify yourself with them.

Godwin: Yes, certainly. That is why the arahants eat.

Retreatant: So in this respect loving-kindness is very useful, loving-kindness towards our body although our own body is like stray cats and dogs. It seems as though it is loving-kindness to oneself.

Godwin: It's useful. This reminds me of one of the stories in the Buddhist texts. The Buddha emphasised to a group of monks to develop a feeling of foulness towards the body. And some of the monks who meditated on foulness in a very serious and intense way, committed suicide because they started hating their bodies. Then the Buddha immediately emphasised the importance of developing loving-kindness. So maybe with loving-kindness you learn to detach yourself not by hating the body but with friendliness, learning to disidentify yourself.

Retreatant: I would like to add one comment to the other gentleman's experience. That is, I have heard from another Buddhist teacher who said something about our body which really struck me. He said that although we may find our body a burden sometimes we have to understand that our body is the total result of our past actions. And as the body is the result of our past actions, so we are responsible for it, because Buddhism teaches us not only to put down things or ignore them, but it also tells us to discharge our duties responsibly. So even though this body is going to get old, get sick and die, and more and more problems may come, we have to understand that this is the result of our past actions. So we have to take good care of this body in order to discharge the responsibilities which we created in our past, and also make use of our body as a vehicle to carry on with our practice.

Godwin: Yes. That's the area which I want to emphasise. I'm happy you touched on that aspect. In fact this is related to one of the reflections meditating monks do in Sri Lanka and maybe also in other countries where there are serious meditators. Before they start to eat they say that I am eating the food not to make this body beautiful but so that the body can survive and so that I can use the body as a vehicle for the practice.

Retreatant: I enjoy the yoga sessions led by S. very much and two points mentioned by her especially. The first point is she always emphasises that we should have a smile when doing yoga so that we can really relax ourselves. And the second point is that she emphasises we should try to enjoy doing simple actions. I think this is very important. And after practising yoga I remind myself to smile when I practise walking meditation or standing meditation outdoors, and I find that a smile can help me to relax my body and my mind.

Godwin: In fact that reminds there is a famous meditation master from Vietnam, Thich Nhat Hanh, who emphasises very much that when you are sitting also just to smile while sitting. He says that when you have a Buddha-like smile the face can relax and the meditation can be relaxed, there can be a lightness to the practice. And he also emphasises very much the need to smile at others. The only thing is that it must come naturally.

Retreatant: I want to ask her, when she practises toilet meditation, does she smile or not?

Retreatant: I don't think so, but I will try!

Godwin: Talking of toilet meditation, S. had an interesting toilet meditation this morning. Like other meditators she shared this experience with me. So I would ask her to share this experience with the group.

Retreatant: I would have liked to come to the hall for meditation this morning but I couldn't. I was locked in the toilet. And then they turned out the light also. Standing there in the dark, with the door locked, I thought: What am I going to do now? I thought of a book title that I like very much: "The Wisdom of No Escape". So I thought rather than escape from the situation, I'll meditate there.

Godwin: It is interesting that the Buddha said in one text, called the Satipatthana Sutta, the sutta which describes how one should develop awareness, that even when we are in the toilet, we should make an effort to be mindful, to be aware. So it's interesting that in whatever you do, even when you are in the toilet, you can use meditation.

Today I hope some of you discovered some tools for working with unpleasant emotions, and that you also discovered that there are times during the day when these emotions are absent, which is also very important. In this connection, a meditation master said something very interesting. He said we look for only what is wrong in us, we never look for what is right in us. So we should learn to be more and more positive and to be aware of our positive states of mind rather than only be concerned about negative states of mind.

The Mirror-like Mind

Ideally, we can then go beyond the positive and the negative, which means we are open to both states of mind. This is related to the meditation technique that I presented which can be described as having a mirror-like mind, where we learn to reflect things just as they are. When something that is considered beautiful comes before a mirror it reflects that beautiful object just as it is. When something that is considered ugly comes before the mirror, again the mirror reflects it just as it is.

So Vipassana meditation, insight or wisdom meditation, is developing such a mind where you learn to reflect things just as they are. And meditation of Samatha, calm and tranquillity, can be seen as polishing away the dust that is on the mirror. So when the mirror is polished very clear, applying this simile to our mind, then we can see very sharply and very clearly what arises in our mind, and hopefully learn to see things just as they are.

So this technique I presented today is extremely important, and what is also important is that it can be practised in everyday life. You don't have to have a particular posture, you don't have to close your eyes. You are merely aware of what is happening in your mind and body. So then in such situations in everyday life, if you are reacting, if you are having emotions, physical pain or mental pain you realise it and you see it just as it is, no minus. And then in everyday life we also can have pleasant experiences and when we have pleasant experiences, positive experiences, just know it with awareness and reflect it just as it is.

I would like to share with you today in regard to the people who brought us a supply of food. Some of them have done a three-day retreat here and I asked them were they able to continue what they learnt here in everyday life. They said it was not so easy as meditating here but still they were able to do it to a great extent. So I was very happy to hear this. They did only a three-day retreat and you are doing a nine-day retreat so it will be much easier for you. Perhaps on the last day we should have a discussion about this very important aspect.

Thoughts

Tomorrow the object of meditation will be our thoughts. This is a very important area. In simple terms, it is because of thoughts that we have suffering. Another thing is that from morning, from the time we wake up, to the time we go to sleep we have thoughts going through our mind continuously. So we should learn how to use our thoughts. We should learn to make discoveries about our thoughts. We should learn the important connection, relationship, between thoughts and emotions, because it is mostly a thought that creates an emotion. And when the emotion is there it is again the thought that makes it worse. Then sometimes these negative thoughts can be a very strong habit with some people. I know meditators who have this strong habit to give themselves minuses, and they give minuses to others also. So one can create a hell where only minuses exist.

Another very interesting and important area for us to discover is how we can create stories from our thoughts. Now from what happened to S. this morning she could have created a big story. She had one hour to create a big story. She could have started by saying it is someone who doesn't like my yoga who did this to me, and for one hour she could have been imagining who might the person be who did this to her. So she might have thought: Maybe it is that person, the way that person looks at me, it seems that person doesn't like me, so it is possible that she did it. We are laughing but this is exactly how we create our stories.

We can use our thoughts in a very destructive way but also in a creative way. So in a way most of our suffering comes from this kind of imagination, using thoughts to create stories. And what is unfortunate is that we take the stories as real. It is funny we give reality to something unreal and then we become victims of the stories that we create ourselves. And with such a story, S. could have had anger, she could have had fear, and anxiety that whenever she goes to the toilet someone is going to lock the door on her! So in this way she could have had all these emotions: fear, insecurity, perhaps sadness. Do you see how the story and these emotions are related? Do you realise how important it is for us to be aware and to understand the nature of thoughts?

I would suggest that we can use thoughts destructively in the way that I have been describing and we can also use thoughts creatively to free ourselves of our suffering. So it is important in our practice to see the difference.

Using thoughts creatively is using reflection. So perhaps on the last day, or one day before the last day, I would like you to reflect on the Four Noble Truths in everyday life. This can be a very important reflection: How do I create my own suffering in everyday life? Because being in a place like this you can get some sort of distance from what is happening in everyday life. To see the different situations in life where you suffer. Then to reflect: Now in what way do I create my own suffering in this situation? Then from that you can realise the third and fourth Noble Truths: So this is the way I should work with my suffering. So when you do this reflection, I would like to get you to reflect very deeply. And then what is important is whether you are really clear to find a way out of suffering. So this is how we can use thoughts creatively.

So tomorrow our object of meditation will be just thoughts. And then from these thoughts I would like you to make your own discoveries about yourself. Our thoughts, our pre-occupations, tell us a lot about ourselves.

Does anyone have any questions?

Questions and Answers

Retreatant: Before the questions, on behalf of everyone, I just want to say sorry to S. because until now I did not know we had locked her in the toilet.

Godwin: I think it has not been done intentionally! And what is interesting is that what can be considered as a negative experience, we can make it positive by meditating on it. So this is a very important principle. In any situation in life we can create stories and suffer, or we can use the same situation not to suffer but to make use of that situation. So S. should be thankful to the person who gave her this opportunity and hope tomorrow the person will give her another opportunity!

Retreatant: Before we meditate, the last person will lock all the doors. This is our practice.

Godwin: Anyway it is very nice that we had a very light-hearted discussion. So Dhamma discussions need not always be so very serious and intense. Sometimes this lightness and humour can be very relaxing also for our practice, to be able to laugh at life.

One day I was talking to a very wise monk in Sri Lanka. He has written very deep and profound books on Buddhism, like "Concept and Reality in Early Buddhist Thought". He has also translated some Buddhist discourses into English. We were talking and he suddenly said: Sometimes I see life as a joke. Sometimes it can be a bad joke like when you find yourself locked in a toilet, but it's still a joke! This kind of attitude to life can give lots of lightness and joy.

So with this light-hearted atmosphere that has been created today we can do some beautiful chanting and then end with meditation of loving-kindness related to this. Yesterday I very much enjoyed the chanting, and there was a beautiful atmosphere while chanting and after the chanting also.